title says it all...I have a reminder in my phone for every Monday to write and how it will be good for me...but I don't...story of my life...yadda yadda BLAH!!!
So anyways, moving on...
Summer was...great. I'm sad its over, well not really cause we have some 80 degree days ahead, but it was fun...didn't do as much camping as in prior years but it was still a blast and full of friends and good times. That's why I don't write, I'm not fired up or sad or pissed, I'm too busy having fun...but in the words of my favorite-yet headless-Stark, Winter is coming.
Ahh winter, or "depressions summer" as I just now labeled it (copyright, TM, etc). Where it fights and fights to come out and play. I mean conditions are PERFECT-dark sky's, clouds, rain, gobs of candy with Halloween, massive overeating for Thanksgiving...and Christmas? That's depressions DISNEYLAND (gosh I'm clever) But that's besides the point. The point is I am going to get ahead of the curve on this bad boy and make it my bitch.
Now mind you, I'm still not all "thrilled" to celebrate the holidays...I'm alone, so jealousy runs RAMPANT...babies and weddings and "first this" and (gag me) "that" NOT a fan...but secretly, OK? I love you forever but sometimes I don't know why I have Facebook because its a breading ground for that shit, but who am I kidding, I'm addicted to the audience I have on the one hand, and I get to stay connected to all my wonderful family and friends on the other. Ahh the delicate balance. But don't get it twisted, I know what I'm about and irony is not lost on this girl.
As always I'm going off in another direction...Now don't get me wrong-again, I love you all so much, you don't EVEN know, but I would say that sometimes my DEPRESSION doesn't like you...all that much...during the time we are about to enter.
So this is what I'm going to do. I got a hold of a happy light and will be giving that a shot. (Google it) FOOTBALL is BACK and amidst the scandals, I'm all in. I even got into a fantasy league, but It's numbers and junk but I'm testing it out...AND I'm going to write.
I'll just tell you now, not all of you are going to like it, but it needs to get out so out it will come. It will be cathartic and crazy and I will get through this winter better than I started, that is my goal.
As far as my depression goes I find that if I have something to look forward to, the more my mind is consumed with that, than the pity party I'm trying to host in my head. We have got Oktoberfest coming up...Also going to my 3rd Hawks game early Nov. Then the "West Coast Homecoming" aka Hawks vs Santa Clara on Thanksgiving, that will be EPIC! (again, copyright, TM, etc) So sharing those stories and capturing the memories will be important for the "spirals"
Also I have been listening to and watching a lot of comedy lately, and of coarse, me being me, I now want to be a comedian. I mean I could do it right? I'm funny and while I have not had the most glamorous life, the things Ive been through, situations and events, people I have met, are sometimes hilarious. It feels good to laugh and I know I cant just jump into being a comedian but lets just say I've been missing Comedy Central. Oh the first world problem of only having Internet.
Segue: Speaking of first world problems...
I recently became familiar with the whole "net neutrality" issue...and it pisses me off. Not in the way you may think, in the way I think.
REALLY 'MERICA????? So the fat cats wanna get in on this crazy "free" Internet and start milking that cow...are you not surprised? And spare me the Obama admin crap argument, that's not it. What's IT is that you can not TELL me it would come to this...maybe it a 30 something thing to finally come to the realization that the ones with all the wealth only want one thing: more wealth. As they get down on lower class people for being addicted to drugs, or what ever vice they have, they keep sniffin the money up their noses. I will NEVER have money, like real money. I could not even comprehend how to live life with that type of wealth that these people who are involved with this have and why they want more...that's why I'm almost to the point of flabbergasted (YES!!! when do you EVER get to use that in a sentence! WOO!) I'm almost to the point of flabbergasted that this is even an issue to the point of petitions and protests and full out 24 hr news coverage. So I'm going to have to pay more for something that should be granted to all, not just the super rich. So things are going to be regulated, and quantified and my privacy will be in jeopardy. Not surprised in the LEAST, cause that's what happens in this country. And sorry society, once you give into the insane pull this beast the Internet has on you, your privacy is null and void. As mentioned above, irony: lost this girl not...a little Yoda for ya there :)
COME ON FIRST WORLD can we please not be such douche bags? Can we PLEASE stop thinking that our "offense" over something deserves full scale justice? WHO. THE. HELL. CARES. This is it! This is what life is. This is what our country does. We choose to live here because it is not as f*&%ed up as some countries, but lets not pretend it is still not pretty f*&%ed up. So you gotta choose the horrible smelly messed up bad, with the glimmer and hopes of good. That's just the way of it. I suppose 30 something also involves a heightened level of cynicism, or ability to smell bullshit, either work for me.
This brings me to my final point. Rome. Why Rome? Rome was the shit back in the day. Flocks of people wanted to live there, it was brimming with culture and art, new ideas, innovation and technology...but also the most diabolical, corrupt, sick, disgusting society in all of history, thus far. I mean a few spans of time come close to the villainy and debauchery that Rome had back in its hey day, but to me Rome was the worst, and not surprisingly amazingly close to my good 'ole U S of A.
Here's the point: Rome fell. Hard. HARRRRRD! What if its starting to happen now to us in our country? I mean since the introduction of the Internet the world has gone nuts, you know it, I know it. People think they are safe? Nope...viral video that points otherwise. People think they are doing good? Nope...tweet comes out that the motives were selfish AND here is the proof. And you already know my stance on "privacy"
So anyways, the more I hear and see while I check my facebook and e-mail. The more I see on my favorite web sites I visit daily, the more I buy things online, and only text my friends instead of call, all of it makes me think of Rome and how it thought that it was at the tip-top of civilization, it was the badass of badass. Everyone wanted a piece of the good life...but eventually it all came crashing down.
Just like my Internet is apparently about to do.
Yep I said it.
No comments:
Post a Comment